Committed Love

APRIL
“I am committed to others because He first committed to me.”

Read it: Romans 12:9-10

Think on it:

I don’t often go to the “Urban Dictionary” for the best definition of a word. However, as I was looking for a good definition of commitment, I saw this and thought it was too good not to share.

Commitment is what transforms the promise into reality.
It is the words that speak boldly of your intentions.
And the actions which speak louder than the words.
It is making the time when there is none.
Coming through time after time after time, year after year after year.
Commitment is the stuff character is made of; the power to change the face of things.
It is the daily triumph of integrity over skepticism.

“When I say I love you, I mean that I’m committed to working to love you even when it’s hard.”

In Romans 12:9-10, Paul tells us that love must be sincere. This type of love is a committed love. It is a love that says, “Put your money where your mouth is.” It is perfectly described in 1 John 3:18, “…let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and truth.”  This type of love is a “self-sacrificing, caring commitment that shows itself in seeking the highest good of the one loved” (author unknown). Committed love does not decide to love someone one day and to not love them the next day. It is a decision to love someone, no matter what. Paul lays out some important thoughts about committed love in this week’s Scripture.

• Committed love must be sincere (verse 9) – the Greek word used here is “sine cera.” It literally means “without wax.” Back in Paul’s time, dishonest merchants would sell pots that were cracked. They would fill in the cracks with wax and then put a glaze over that to hide the cracks. They would then sell that pot as if there were no cracks. In time, the owner would discover that the pot was worthless and they had been deceived. Honest merchants would stamp the words “sine cera” on the pot to declare it was without wax. Sincere love is without wax, or without hypocrisy. Our love for others needs to be a true one, not a pretend love, not one that will leak or fall apart over time. We should sincerely desire God’s best for others and speak and act toward that goal.
• Committed love must abhor what is evil and cling to what is good (verse 9) – love distinguishes between what is right and what is wrong. To abhor evil is a strong command. It means to hate, to turn from, to avoid. However, notice that it says hate what is evil – not who. Jesus loved many people while He walked this earth. He did not approve of what they did, and He would direct them to “go and sin no more.” But, He loved them. The Bible tells us that “God demonstrates His own love for us in this: while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8). He never excused our sin. He came because of the evil that sin had wreaked in this world and in the lives of people. Love the sinner, hate the sin.
• Committed love is the devoted love found in a loving, close-knit, and mutually supportive family (verse 10) – the basis for this love is not that we know each other well, or that we even enjoy each other. The basis is that we are related to one another as Christians. That tie with one another is reason enough to evoke a caring heart for each other. They are our brother or sister, and we are to treat them warmly and with acceptance.
• Committed love is selfless and humble, giving honor to the other person (verse 10) – the Phillips version of this verse says, “…a willingness to let the other man have the credit.” We are not to seek honor for ourselves. Instead, we are to genuinely rejoice when others receive honor and we don’t. We should not be “doing” things for the glory of doing them. Rather we are to be “doing” things because it benefits the one we are “doing” for. You cannot allow yourself to ask, “What’s in it for me?” Committed love asks, “What’s in it for the one I love?”

Romans 12:1-2 tells us that we are to live a sacrificial, transformed life. There is no way we can truly apply this committed love on our own and under our own power. Verse 2 tells us that once God’s power transforms us, “Then you will be able to test, and approve what God’s will is – His good, pleasing, and perfect will.” The command given to us is to love others. The way to do it is clearly laid out in Scripture. The power to do it is available to us through the Holy Spirit. We have everything we need. But the choice to do it rests on us. What will your choice be this week?

Pray about it:

“Father, I desire to be obedient to Your command to love others; to have sincere love. But I need Your transforming power to do so. It is not always easy to sincerely love – yet that is Your command. I ask that this week You help me to yield to Your power to demonstrate committed love to those around me. Help me to not be blind to opportunities to love others. Amen.”

Act on it:

Spend time this week thinking and praying about the different aspects of the concept of committed love. Is there something specific you need to work on?

• How sincere is my love for others? Or am I just faking it?
• Am I doing for the other person because it is what is best for them?
• Am I hating what is evil and clinging to what is good according to the world or according to God’s Word?
• Do I really see my fellow believers as brothers and sisters, and am I committed to them as I am to my family?
• Am I acting in a selfless manner and honoring the other person?

Parenting Tips:

Children easily love others. It is their nature to do for others and to find joy in the doing. Foster this in them while they are young so that it becomes a lifestyle for them. Let them see the joy you have in the doing for others – not for the reward or for the recognition, but for the benefit of others.